4 weeks old

Doesn’t time fly when you’re having fun?! Clara is 4 weeks old today, and what a four weeks its been!

To celebrate, Clara has her very own crown today (only right considering she’s referred to as Princess on the ward) and she’s wearing a dress for the very first time. A dress is actually a lot easier for Clara as it keeps her leg free where her important Long Line goes in. We just need to get her some pretty socks to keep her long toes and feet warm. Time for some crib side online shopping!

Clara was also moved to her crib last night from her incubator. This is a huge milestone in getting her in the swing of things for her longer term care this year. I’ll also be ordering Clara her first cot mobile later to give her some more visual stimulation. It might be a big girls bed but she still looks tiny in it!

We went to visit the ward in the children’s hospital that Clara will move to in a couple of weeks if all continues to go well. It’s very family oriented, the environment was certainly designed with children in mind. In just the 10 minutes we were there we saw a balloon man making a balloon dog for a little boy, a music therapy man with a guitar, a school room, a large play area and more. Whilst Clara may be too young for this entertainment at the moment, it’s a promising indicator of how they view child development outside of the obvious medical care.

It’s also scary to move though. I’m used to Intensive Care, I love the nurses and doctors here, I know my way around with my eyes closed. The ward feels like a children’s hospital, it feels more like a hospital in general. That must sound strange given we are in Intensive Care but it’s what we’ve always known, it’s not scary here. I still associate it with birth and being on a private ward, both of which I loved. Moving to children’s ward means a lot less nurse and doctor visibility, and a lot more onus on me to take care of Clara. I know I can do it, but I worry. What about over night? Should I stay every night? What if she turns unwell, would I know?

Clara’s condition presents physical challenges. I can’t walk up and down the corridor, bouncing her in my arms to comfort her, as she’s attached to her machines. If we are put in an independent room that means our own space, a room I can make her own this year that feels more like home, but it also means more isolation. A bed on the bay means Clara will be around other children and me around other parents, but it’s not got the home comforts and we’re here for a very long time. It’s not something I should think about really, I don’t think we get the choice of a room or not, and there’s weeks until we move.

Let’s make the most of the good times, times like this week.

Happy 4 weeks birthday my little Clara, I love you so much. Let’s keep snuggling our way through 2018.

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